


sweet blue (sing for me)

by withluvsan (lostlovelis)



Series: of all colors (i chose you) [1]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Blindness, How do I tag?, I Tried, M/M, Seriously i am lost, So is San, deafness, don't be mad at me pls, mingi is there for a sec, no beta we die like men, rated for language, something is wrong probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:08:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26343880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostlovelis/pseuds/withluvsan
Summary: seonghwa fell in love with a fashion designer.hongjoong fell in love with a musician.seonghwa's world was black and hongjoong's was silent.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Series: of all colors (i chose you) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920976
Comments: 13
Kudos: 150





	sweet blue (sing for me)

**Author's Note:**

> i made my own research about blindness and deafness, but if i still missed something, please let me know!! i'll try to fix it as soon as possible
> 
> ps: i am not an english native speaker so... yeah, i am sorry

Seonghwa was blind.

No “more's”, no “but's” and no longer explanations. He was just born like that.

He had stunning shinning eyes that hid entire galaxies behind sunglasses and long bangs. Slim, tall body hid under loose sweaters and worn out jeans. He didn’t care enough to try to fit in.

Since he was a kid, Seonghwa was in love. He fell in love with music.

At the age of 6, his mother put him in music classes, as a hobby to keep him busy. Music was his first lover.

Between special classes and homework, he took countless piano and voice classes. He couldn’t see, but he could sing.

Because of his blindness, Seonghwa was always hyper-aware of his surroundings.

Sounds, sensations, scents. His other senses were always standing out, making up for his sight absence.

His second lover was the piano.

Notes after notes, dancing through the empty rooms of his music classes as he sang. He loved to hear the echoes, the shifting sounds around his head, floating like vapor above him and letting him draw a scene on his mind. Scenes were composed of sounds for him.

A sad sound, a happy note, a flat tone. Everything was so easily draw for him, because it was his life, the only way of living that he ever knew.

To Seonghwa, everything was a blur of nothings. His darkness was different from other people’s darkness. He was still scared of his own blindness.

Until the day he met him.

Kim Hongjoong.

Hongjoong was a partially deaf kid from his elective class on university.

At the age of 15, Hongjoong lost almost 60% of his audition. The loss was caused by a genetic disease.

If Seonghwa started college late because he had to catch up with his blindness, so did Hongjoong with his deafness. The difference was that Hongjoong was learning with baby steps. Still scared, still crawling.

Hongjoong was always wearing special gears to help him to hear. He also loved to hear Seonghwa sing when they slept over at each other’s dorm's.

Hongjoong was Seonghwa's third lover.

Seonghwa fell in love with his giggles at first. An angelic sound that he heard at the library, while listening to his guide explaining about the protocols of the place.

Mingi, Seonghwa’s designed personal guide and tutor, scolded the boy for giggling too loudly, which caused him to laugh even more.

Hongjoong's friend slapped a hand over the boy's mouth, Seonghwa could hear the sound of skin hitting skin, followed by Mingi's loud sigh.

Seonghwa could say that the person who giggled was just happy, feeling loose and unbothered. It was light and soothing, like morning sunlight hitting your skin. That was how Seonghwa felt.

-Sorry, Mingi. Hyung is just being silly again – it was an apologetic tone, Seonghwa noticed, but filled with sweetness and care. He assumed the third boy was talking about the giggling one.

-It's fine, San. Just don't let Yeosang kick you guys out again – and then Mingi's voice was also light, also oh-so sweet because of fondness and love and worry towards the one's Seonghwa assumed were his friends.

-Who are they? – Seonghwa was curious, as always. He was always curious, always asking, always trying. He always wanted to know more.

-Come here. I'll introduce you – and so Mingi did.

Mingi introduced his playful friend with cute dimples and high-pitched laugh (“ _Here, you can try and touch my dimples. They’re, like, small holes on my cheeks_ ” San, after asking for permission, carefully took Seonghwa's hands and put them on his cheeks, letting the taller boy explore his face with his fingertips) and also the giggling one, who was weirdly quiet now.

-Hongjoong, why are you so quiet? – San was worried, the “ _something-happened_?” kind of worry, Seonghwa could tell.

-Nothing. It’s just that I am not used to actually see more visually impaired people like me around – Seonghwa tilted his head unconsciously, holding a giggle he himself.

-Just say that I am blind, already. That’s what I am – and then he smiled, shrugging as if it was nothing – It’s not an offense, just a fact. At least for me – Hongjoong nodded on his place, quietly, and Mingi put a hand on Seonghwa's shoulder gently.

-Let's go. I'll drop you at our dorm before my noon classes. You didn’t bring your can, so I can’t let you wander around without supervision – and they left. No more words, no goodbyes and no small talks about later on. They just left, almost quietly as death.

.

When Mingi came back that evening, they ate fast-food and talked about the day.

What did Seonghwa like about university. What did he hate. Why were he there.

They talked about everything and nothing, and just liked they spoke, they slept unintentionally.

.

The second time Seonghwa and Hongjoong met, Seonghwa was late to his class, standing in the middle of the corridor and trying to think about anything that could tell him where he was.

-Seonghwa? – a light touch on his shoulder made the brunette jump on his feet, scared – I am sorry, it wasn’t on purpose – Seonghwa took a deep breath and nodded, turning in the direction of the voice, which came slightly from under him - It's Hongjoong, Mingi’s friend, by the way.

-The one from the library? – Hongjoong confirmed, and Seonghwa was so used to analyze every sound and shift around him that he simply knew when Hongjoong shifted his weight on his feet, a nervous humming leaving his throat.

-Aren't you going to ask what is my disability? – Seonghwa left out a giggle, supporting both his hands on the top of his cane.

-It's insensitive to do so, but I have another thing to ask you for – Seonghwa fixed his posture a bit, trying to look more serious as he heard Hongjoong comply – Can you help me get to my class? I am hella lost and I don’t have any idea in which corridor I am right now – it made Hongjoong blurt out a sweet laugh, as if it wasn’t what he was expecting.

-You scared the shit out of me. I thought you would ask for help to hide a body or something like that – Seonghwa simply smirked, loosing his posture once again. Being with Hongjoong was so easy, and he was loving the sensation – Here, hold on my arm. You are lucky that I know where you should go because Mingi couldn’t shut up about you being late for your class – Hongjoong tapped Seonghwa's hand lightly and held it to put around his elbow. Seonghwa guessed Mingi had taught him on how to interact with Seonghwa on the basics.

-He is practically a babysitter that I don't need – Seonghwa complained, a soft smile on his lips. Truth be told, Seonghwa was glad that Mingi was so easy to tag along. Always caring, always worrying.

-Says the man who was lost and late for his class – Seonghwa laughed again, shrugging. Hongjoong turned a corner, and so did him – And answering your unspoken question, I am deaf.

-I know it is hella insensitive, and I am sorry, but how the fuck are you deaf? – another giggle, and Hongjoong pulled him to right for a bit, as Seonghwa heard footsteps passing him hurriedly.

-I wasn’t born deaf. I lost my audition on my teenager years. I wear a pair of gears on my ears, so I can partially hear some things – Seonghwa agreed quietly, taking a few steps without saying anything.

-Am I speaking too low? – he was concerned. He didn’t knew much about other disabilities but his own, so it was frustrating. He was an introvert, and speaking quietly was part of his nature by now.

-No, no. It’s the opposite, actually – Hongjoong walked slowly, as if he wasn’t actually worried about class. He probably wasn’t – I can't properly hear high pitched sounds, but lower tones are easier to distinguish and understand. Your voice is deep and it makes my life a thousand times easier – Seonghwa nodded again, matching his steps with Hongjoong's in the silent corridor.

-And how do you speak? Can you hear what you are saying? – the wind hit their sides, bringing along the scent of grass and distant smoke of the city. Seonghwa tighted his grip on Hongjoong's elbow on slightest, firming up himself.

-I try to articulate the words more than a normal person. Mingi says that sometimes I sound like the Papago dictionary voice. I can't really hear it outside of my mind, so I don’t care much – Seonghwa let out a small “oh”, still digesting Hongjoong's fake easiness with turning deaf. He could feel the boy's tension on his movements under his sleeves – Here we are. The class has, like, more 15 minutes. Do you really want to get in? – they stopped on their tracks and Seonghwa could hear the lecturer's voice behind the door, aside from the corridor sounds.

-Do you know somewhere quiet? We can keep chatting until our next period – Hongjoong giggled, gently putting his hand over Seonghwa’s and squeezing it lightly.

-There's a small café down the street. It's empty most of the time, so I think it won't fuss much with your hearing – Seonghwa nodded and let out a small smile.

From there, they became close.

Hongjoong was a Fashion student, and Seonghwa's new time pass turned into fussing the boy's fabrics.

In the other hand, Hongjoong loved to hear Seonghwa’s rehearsals for his exams.

“ _Your voice is so deep and soothing. Sometimes, when you sing, even if I can’t understand anything, it still makes me feel better. It gets inside of my brain and lows down my anxiety. It works like magic_.”

They found their own harmony on their pace.

Sounds, scents, touches. It worked for them.

Seonghwa’s first love was music, and now he was in love with someone who couldn’t hear at all, but always listened to his songs.


End file.
